I miss you, Mom

Everyday I look at your picture, wishing this world would somehow decide to let me be with you again.

Your smile and laugh, that sounds so mirthful it’s contagious, I miss it so much. No matter how childish the reasons may be, and even if sometimes it’s the other way around for the two of us, being with you is all that matters. All the bickering and tears, even those I miss. If the world were a bit kinder to me, I would not lose you albeit temporarily. And I feel this overwhelming sadness, because the ever bittersweet Christmas is coming again. Another one without you, another one incomplete, another one I’m- we’re supposed to endure. I am not as sweet, as showy, and as good as the other girls out there, but I love you, so very much. The clothes you used to wear and the mannerisms that you have are all still burned in my mind, and it’s scaring the hell out of me that they’re blurring bit by bit- with no new memories to replace them. I know that it might make you sad when you read this, it might even make you cry. But I want you to know, that I’m very thankful for everything that you’ve done for me. I pray, that even in this situation, you are happy. You may have met new people that became special to you, who makes you happy, and you want to spend the rest of your life with. I will support you, but please be very careful and wise in your decisions. I’m saying this here because I don’t have the courage to say it to you directly. It is funny, and highly unusual that I would feel shy considering our relationship. But anyways, enough of this.

This song was once written by you in a small notebook, I can still hear your soft singing voice and I will never, ever forget it:

I’ll walk in the rain by your side

I’ll cling to the warmth of your hand

I’ll do anything to keep you satisfied

I’ll love you more than anybody can

And the wind will whisper your name to me

Little birds will sing along in time,

Leaves will bow down when you walk by

And morning bells will chime.

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. cheap moncler
    Dec 13, 2011 @ 17:33:58

    I’d have to check with you here. Which is not something I usually do! I enjoy reading a post that will make people assume. Also, thanks for allowing me to comment!

    Reply

    • shane
      Dec 16, 2011 @ 05:13:13

      Thank you for reading! And I’m really glad you liked it 🙂 I like hiding personal feelings and thoughts through literature 🙂

      Reply

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