My hands found something new and important. And like all things new and important, I wanted to protect it and keep it away from harm or damage.

I love the color lavender. So I wanted it to be the color that would enclose my treasure. But then I saw a golden case that looked so elegant and cool, and I thought, why not this one instead? It would look good in the eyes of many, it would stand out and people would praise me. It would be a good match for my other treasures, and oh! how it would catch the eye of unknown strangers who would see it.

But I love the color lavender. My heart yearns and reaches out to it. And every time I place the lavender and gold side by side, the gold’s shine is dimmed by my heart’s desire. In the end, I chose to follow my heart.

I choose lavender. Because it pleases me. I choose lavender to be the one I see when I wake up, when I do my work, when I have fun, when I write, and when I go to sleep. I choose lavender to protect my treasured possession. I choose the color that makes me happy, not what would make me look happy. I followed my heart, and I have never regretted a single day since.


What Do I Do?

I had a scary thought. And just like most thoughts, it came out of nowhere…

What if the food you were  expecting for dinner was not just different from what you’re expecting, but is totally non-existent?
What if there wasn’t anything prepared at all?

Time stopped for a moment and the suspended dust particles blinked at me.
They seem to be asking,
Whatcha gonna do about it, huh? Whatcha gonna do?
in an annoyingly tantalizing way.

Then time resumed and hot polluted air whipped past my face.

So.. What am I going to do about it?
It’s the most horrendous thing that could happen because-
Come on.
How many of us are not expecting food on the table at meal times, right?
(I know there are a lot. And I’m sorry for even verbalizing/writing/thinking it)
Just- among those who can read this, alright?

And I’ve been looking forward to that dinner ever since I woke up. So…

Am I going to whine about it?
Am I going to flip the table and act out?
Am I going to be blind and naive and stubborn that I’m going to still sit there and wait?
Or am I going to simply walk away from the table, accept it, and move on to my bedroom to sleep?

What do I do?

I wonder…

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December 2018
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