I have never asked for grandiose gestures, nor expensive and luxurious gifts. The tiny things that give me simple, but pure joy need no audience, whether big or small. It only needs to be seen and felt by me, it only needs to be true. Is it?

To be reminded that I am remembered even in the most minute detail is worth more than a bag of diamond rings and delicate strings of pearls. I would honestly shout yes, if you ask for my hand, even with just a ring made of santan flowers.  I am not saying I want no gestures. I am not saying I am apathetic to romance. I only want simple things. I only want you. What about you?

And I want you to understand- that despite all that the eye can see, when people look at me, I am a simple girl with a simple dream. I’ve told you many a time, I want that one thing that I never had. Do you remember?

Let’s, you and I, build a house on a mountain, someplace none can follow. These are the words that my heart is singing. These are the stories my life is living. Do you know them?

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Balance

___

When you brace yourself for something you dread,
Is it wisdom or pessimism that is being fed?
Are you building walls tall enough to protect,
Or are they ever so tall that none could intersect?

When you wear your heart proudly on your sleeve,
Is it passion or are you simply being too naive?
Are you so blinded that only you can’t see the cards?
Are you sure it’s not a game directed by a heartless bard?

___

by Adrienne Luzanne

I wonder how she feels
that one day, suddenly,
the sound of footsteps in her wake faded.
Because it has made its own choices.

It used to plead for answers,
but now it walks alone.
It holds its head high,
and knows its own goal.

And in the beginning,
it never looked back.
For the thought of freedom
was a lifelong yearning
that was finally realized.

But then it felt that liberation
can be a hazard as it is a treat.
Having regrets is suffocatingly sweet.

Because change is unchangeable
in time’s inevitable passing.

In a rush to try everything,
the taste was lost.
Some were spilled,
some were ignored.
And as years passed,
the cycle came to an end
and all that’s left was to go back the bend.

And she stands there waiting,
as described by others:
just the same but with a few more lines
on her beautiful face,
smiling… welcoming…

And until it finds itself
with the same treasure to nurture,
it will pursue her until the end and stay,
no longer behind, but beside her,
to share the wisdom each has learned.

____

by Adrienne Luzanne

Daily Anecdote

A man with a dog came up the jeepney. The people were not amused, for the man was not what society would consider “presentable”, and his dog wore metal chains.

The people beside him leaned away and I honestly would’ve done the same- the dog could bite me and it might have fleas. I usually like dogs. But just like strangers I was told not to talk to, I try not to approach strange dogs.

Just then, two girls came up. One of them was sat beside the man with the dog and she patted the dog’s head with a smile on her young face.

Then I wondered…

She did it without hesitation, like it was the most normal thing in the world. I compared that with how I thought and felt. I suddenly found myself questioning my stand in this world.

Have I become one of those who view this earth as a fortress? Unhappy and always guarded, looking behind constantly, waiting for an attack?
Or am I actually a survivor, wisely prepared for whatever comes in this messy and chaotic jungle we call our home?

Was the girl a heroine of humanity with her purity and innocence, or was she a foolish damsel, serving nothing more than the vicious’ prey?

Pin the donkey’s tail (sans blindfold)

With eyes wide open, where do you look?
Do they stray far from the main road,
Or do they go by the book?

With eyes wide open, what do you see?
Is your vision in top shape condition,
Or is it filled with romanticized fantasies?

With thousands of days filled with experience,
How do you now decide and choose?
On which books to scan, which books to peruse?
Among hundreds of shelves, what is your route?

___

by Adrienne Luzanne

Another loved one gave my most hated advice on this earth. And I finally burst into tears. I am very close to losing it.

Last String

We don’t need to receive balloons to be happy. Don’t we feel equally happy, if not more, every time we give? Being needy is a primal instinct that is no longer this generation’s necessity. Why volunteer when millions of others have taken it upon themselves to overdo the act? So as we live here in this ever-evolving world, why not push ourselves to the limit and maximize our potential, to attempt the bettering of this world, that the selfish and indifferent fail to prioritize?

___

LAST STRING

I was born with a handful of strings in my hand.
And in the short time I have existed, I  let them slip one by one,
because I had precious raindrops to catch.
But I shall not think of it as giving them up.
Rather, I will think of it as letting go.
And now I am letting go, I am setting free,
the very last string that I will ever see.

by Adrienne Luzanne

Uninhibited

I write of beauty
Of things beyond reach.


But I can only
write of these desires,
I can only dream
with my eyes wide.


I should be free.
I should be flying.
Yet ’til now I am caged,
the lock still missing.

___

by Adrienne Luzanne

Life Goes On

Even if it seems pointless or unfair,
Try to understand, try to accept.

Even if every fiber of your being resists,
Take one step, and the rest shall follow.

Even if your heart is burdened,
And the pain almost unbearable,
Be someone’s reason to live.

For the world is not a one-way telescope
There are millions of other perspectives
It does not revolve solely around your own.

There may be doubts,
that’s within reason.
Fears? To each his own.
But still, life goes on. Doesn’t it?

That’s just how it is

And even before the tears started,
I have decided.

In fact, the tears fell
because I wasn’t happy about it.

But in life, choices made
aren’t simply happiness-based.

In life…
We suffer. We smile.
We fall. We stand.
We fight. We yield.
We care. We cry.
We love. We hurt.

And that’s just how it is.

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